Please be patient. A whole new experience is on the horizon...

Day 14_Was That a Good Thing

Start:Jul 16, 2020

Duration:15 Minute(s)

Goal: this Cognitive Trail will increase the confidence to activate hope with a plan (Turning Heartache Into Triumph).

Description: The Next Step series was developed to guide foster teens and young adults through specific step-by-step actions. The steps act a lot like a ... Read More


Step 1

Let's begin today's steps by thinking about your friends.

Do you have friends who make you feel encouraged, supported and respected?

Step 2

Name them along with how much time you spend with them, texting and messaging included.

Step 3

How do you feel about yourself when you're around these friends?

Step 4

What kind of qualities do they bring out in you, and are any of these qualities the ones you've described about yourself that were positive?

Step 5

What about those 'friends' who don't act so friendly toward you?

How do they make you feel? Do you get to express any of your positive qualities when you're around them? Describe the negatives you feel about being around this person or group of people?

Step 6

If your negative feelings are outweighing your positives, then would you consider putting some distance between you and people who make you feel insecure or bad about yourself? To do this means placing limits on how much time you spend with them. It could also mean separating completely.

Step 7

If you realize the need to distance yourself from someone, then ask a trusted source to hold you accountable.

Check in with them regularly to see that you're limiting time with, or even separating from, people who bring out the worst in you.

Step 8

To replace the void made by the unfriendly person, make an effort to pursue at least one new friendship with someone you think is likely to make you feel like you measure up.

We're not talking about a romantic relationship or a hook up. We're talking about a friendship.

Your bold move for today is to get to know people - start befriending people - who seem to have the potential to bring out the best in you.

The qualities you should feel when you're around them - or see others around them - would go something like this: encouraged, at ease, happy and supported.

Yes really. Go after that 'maybe' friend.

Identify the places you're going to go to find that one new 'maybe' friend.

Step 9

Make sure you do something nice for the person holding you accountable, by the way.

They may be taking a lot of nonsense off you for agreeing to help.

Be kind.

List ways you could show your appreciation.

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