Please be patient. A whole new experience is on the horizon...

Start:Jul 04, 2020

Duration:15 Minute(s)

Goal: this Cognitive Trail will increase the confidence to activate hope with a plan (Turning Heartache Into Triumph).

Description: The Next Step series was developed to guide foster teens and young adults through specific step-by-step actions. The steps act a lot like a ... Read More

Summary:

Step 1

Were you able to watch one of the movies we suggested yesterday?

If so, what jumped out at you about the story?

If not, keep going with today's navitents and either watch one of the films as soon as you can or post to let us know you need an alternative task.

Step 2

One of the lessons that pops up over and over again in film is that fresh starts are possible.

When you think about moving forward, you have power you might not have realized before now.

It starts with a simple trick that has a powerful effect.

Adele, one of the world’s great singers, turned her biggest heartache into an album that was awarded 6 Grammys.

She said that many of the songs on '21', such as 'Rolling in the Deep', are about the end of her first love.

Adele told MTV News: "It broke my heart when I wrote this record, so the fact that people are taking it to THEIR hearts is like the best way to recover.”

She directed her pain toward her love for singing and song writing. As she poured herself into her natural gifting, her passion helped her heal. As others benefited from listening to her songs, Adele was able to let go.

Go to the video icon above to watch Adele perform 'Rolling in the Deep'. When you've finished, let us know how it landed with you.

Step 3

Adele was hurt when her boyfriend told her he didn't love her. While it hurt badly at first, the comment became her catalyst for a new start and a better life.

See how you can apply Adele's trick for yourself.

Think about three statements that stung when you heard them. Don't dwell on this. That's not what we're getting at.

Move on quickly to list the opposite of the three comments in one or two words. These should be positive qualities that you can relate to.

It's the positives that we're going to focus on.

Step 4

We've all been on the receiving end of unkind remarks that simply aren't true about us or at least not the real us.

In our innocence we may have believed what was said. Maybe we even acted out to prove it was right.

But it's not right. It's not the real us.

We have a theory that negative labels and comments are the opposite of who we're meant to be. Somehow they're being used to keep us down.

But that doesn't have to be. It's not the end of the story.

It's the turning point.

Consider this: you're already the person with those positive attributes that you listed, and you're already expressing them very naturally just like Adele.

Maybe other people's views were warped by their own negative self image and past experience. Maybe you were just going through a tough time but you're not there anymore. So negative labels don't apply.

What do you think about that?

Step 5

How confident are you that these positive qualities describe the real you?

Step 6

We hope you'll make it a habit to play to your positive side.

We're not saying to be self absorbed. Not at all.

We're saying to recognize that you deserve to be treated well, and that starts with your self image and how you respect yourself when you've been through something difficult.

With that in mind go do something nice for yourself today, like shooting hoops, getting an ice cream, going to the movies, whatever makes you feel good that doesn't have a negative after effect.

What are you going to do?

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