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Day 4_Build from the Core

Start:Jul 12, 2020

Duration:15 Minute(s)

Goal: this Cognitive Trail will improve the ability to make friends who bring out the best in you (My Space).

Description: 'My Space' is part of The Next Step navigational series. Use it like a GPS. Each day it gives specific steps to help you choose friends and ... Read More

Summary:

Step 1

As you saw in the 'Gladiator' clip yesterday, there was a formation unique to Roman soldiers where they overlapped their shields.

It was called the Testudo or "tortoise" battle formation.

Roman soldiers would fit their large, rectangular shields together to form a protective 'roof and walls' all around them.

It was said that once formed the Testudo was so strong that huge boulders couldn't break through. How's that for having your back?

Do you want to know how to have this strong a support system in your own life?

Step 2

To start building a 'Roman Testudo' kind of community of people, start with this.

Remind yourself who you are at your core. We're talking about the values you listed previously that make you who you are.

Remind yourself what they are.

List your most important core values in two or three words.

Step 3

Next list how you think others see you in two or three words only.

Step 4

Honestly examine the qualities that haven't been helpful in building a strong group of friends.

These could be attitudes like anger, insecurity or mistrust. You get the idea.

If you want to change these negatives into constructive traits, then go for the opposite quality.

It could look something like this: from angry friends to confident friends who feel no need to hold grudges or act out.

It helps to seek the things you're looking for in other people. You can model that quality until it becomes natural for you. Be careful with this.

We're NOT saying you should be fake or adopt someone else's mannerisms.

We're NOT saying to become that person.

Be yourself.

Just try on a different quality and its behavior you like based upon the values that are most important to you.

Try on the quality until you understand how it works and how it's helpful for you.

You can go from insecure to confident, for example, by adopting the more self-assured attitudes and behaviors that you see in other people.

Confident, by the way, is not the same as cocky. We don’t recommend cocky. It can turn you into a loner if practiced too much.

List the two or three qualities you like most about yourself.

Step 5

Now list the qualities you'd like to 'try on' that you've seen in others.

Step 6

When are you going to begin?

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