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Day 7_Am I My Own Turbulence

Start:Jul 05, 2020

Duration:15 Minute(s)

Goal: this Cognitive Trail will improve the confidence to resolve differences with your ego intact (Say What?! Escape from Drama).

Description: 'Escape Drama' is part of The Next Step navigational series developed by Jeremiah's Promise (JP). It's designed to be a personal GPS to prov ... Read More

Summary:

Step 1

Like Les Brown said in Day 6, when you decide to go up a level in life, expect turbulence.

Sometimes we can't let go of the past. Our pride and hurt cause us to be our own source of turbulence.

Go to the video icon and watch a scene from 'The Divine Secrets of the YaYa Sisterhood.' You'll see what years of drama make a person become.

Tell us what you think about the clip when you've finished watching it.

Step 2

Can you see how pride, assumptions and attitude can change the whole outcome of an argument for good or bad?

Step 3

Drama Buster #4
Keep it chill.

It's really hard to go off on somebody who looks calm, cool and confident. What's the fun in that?

Will you be the one who stays chill and looks unperturbed when a disagreement threatens to escalate?

Step 4

Here's the best way we know how to look calm and confident no matter what's going on around us.

Pay attention to
* facial expressions
* body language
* words that encourage
* words that criticize
* words that are sarcastic
* tone of voice

Pick two of the above and write how you could change an outcome by changing your reaction.

Step 5

You'll know how you're doing if you watch the other person's reaction:

*Do they look down as you talk?
*OR do they maintain eye contact, mirroring back how you're reacting to them?

*Do they shrug and stop speaking?
*Do they seem tense or uncomfortable?
*OR do they relax and speak in a normal tone?

*Do they laugh nervously or sarcastically?
*OR do they laugh easily and see humor in the situation?

*Do they get loud or defensive?
*OR do they smile and offer a way to resolve differences?

Think about your last not-so-good interaction.

What happened? Did you notice any of the above behaviors in the conversation? Your part or theirs? Write your observations in the space provided. Be honest here. No need to feel like you have to defend yourself. You are simply observing reactions. Nothing more.

Step 6

Ask your best friend, a trusted family member, a neighbor who knows you well to talk to you about the response others have regarding your interactions, in general.

What you're looking for is someone who has enough wisdom and experience to be truthful and help you identify behaviors that you may be blind to. And all of us have blinders in some area of our lives. Those are the filters we've been discussing.

What's your level of interest in talking to someone to get a better perspective about yourself?

Step 7

If you said 'interested', then go DO it.

* Find the person.
* Speak to the person.
* Chill as you Listen to the person.
* Take their advice.
* See what changes.

Will you do this?

If not, think hard about why you said no. Is it time, inability to trust, hard to find that person, etc?

Trust us with this suggestion. It could change your life. For better.

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